I find myself changing. I'm a different person than I was when I landed in Eugene. Your experiences change you and I find that part of life invigorating and exciting. I've had a pretty negative attitude about Eugene and have insisted on not being very happy but I think I've found the plateau. Life is what you make it and I'm really tired of making it crappy. Yes, the weather is not ideal. Yes, I have not found the ideal art community I was hoping for. Yes, we are in the more conservative part of town where I am not comfortable on any given day.
But all that is not the main thing. The main thing is very important. I'm finding my main thing. I'm finding that I'm happy here in spite of it all. I like the challenge of everything. People are intense here. But I don't mind as much as I used to. I get it now.
I joined a soccer team this season. I would never have done this in California. But I did it here. I really found it challenging. I loved it. I hates it. Its very challenging and not really my thing. At least in the sense that I am not competitive. I want to high-five people on the other team when they score a goal. I guess you shouldn't do that. But that is what I want to do. I forget to pay attention to the score in the game. I sometimes don't know what the score is at the end of the game and have to ask who won. I'm not a jock I guess. Well, duh. I know this. I'm artsy, I just am.
I'm, maybe, a bit competitive in the arts but even then. Not really. I don't know what that means for me career - wise but I don't really care. I really enjoy being supportive and encouraging to other artists. If that screws me in the end well, oh well. I'm not going to change.
Well, I'm off to make some of my very own Oregon type art now. I definitely feel that is my new identity. I'm okay with that. Its a part of my journey.
But all that is not the main thing. The main thing is very important. I'm finding my main thing. I'm finding that I'm happy here in spite of it all. I like the challenge of everything. People are intense here. But I don't mind as much as I used to. I get it now.
I joined a soccer team this season. I would never have done this in California. But I did it here. I really found it challenging. I loved it. I hates it. Its very challenging and not really my thing. At least in the sense that I am not competitive. I want to high-five people on the other team when they score a goal. I guess you shouldn't do that. But that is what I want to do. I forget to pay attention to the score in the game. I sometimes don't know what the score is at the end of the game and have to ask who won. I'm not a jock I guess. Well, duh. I know this. I'm artsy, I just am.
I'm, maybe, a bit competitive in the arts but even then. Not really. I don't know what that means for me career - wise but I don't really care. I really enjoy being supportive and encouraging to other artists. If that screws me in the end well, oh well. I'm not going to change.
Well, I'm off to make some of my very own Oregon type art now. I definitely feel that is my new identity. I'm okay with that. Its a part of my journey.
Comments
Post a Comment